Struggle to Success | Shame
I felt shame instead of being hopeful and excited.
My vision was becoming clear on where I wanted to go in life.
And I noticed with the more clarity I had, the greater my ambition was to take action on making it a reality.
To be able to make a massive step in the apparent right direction, I recognized I needed a writing coach.
My anxiety urged me to never get such assistance.
I also believed those that needing such assistance possibly lacked the skills altogether to ever be a decent writer.
Yeah, my self belief was that I could not learn to be an acceptable writer of any sort.
As well as those that needed writing help were failed humans. I pushed past my feelings and took f*ing action on my needs regardless of all the bizarre mental and physical alarm bells.
Afterall, feelings follow behavior, not vice versa.
In doing so, this one action shook up my nervous system enough to let it know [ME know] that all the fear and lacking-of I felt were grounded in absolutely nothing.
I came to know that having a writing coach is what successful people do and how previously successful people write even better than the day before. It was not about coming from a place of lacking or being less-than. No, rather seeking assistance is all about amplifying what it is we want to accomplish by using professional help, which is a smart thing to do. Use the resources that life offers to be the best version of your self. A learning mindset is what successful people use. A learning mindset is in fact a Growth Mindset.
Maybe you already f*ing called it. But, YEAH….I had one helluva fixed mindset.
What an amazing shit storm combo: zero self belief + fixed mindset = a life of struggle.
With my fixed mindset I could not break past the belief that “needing to learn something new” meant I was born lesser than, and I would struggle to ever be a substantial human being as-is.
I failed to recognize that all humans are only born with one thing: the desire to learn.
Let me say this fact again > all humans are only born with one thing: the desire to learn.
THATS F*ING IT
That's all we got off the bat, from the womb!
Yeah, we are all very basically born the same. No one is more or less talented fresh out of the hot tunnel.
Everything else we, basically, bring into our lives with ability, sometimes talent, and perseverance.
We are born with some skill and talents, sure. But even then those humans, including me with dance, have to continue to practice and develop those skills both in our minds and bodies on the regular. If I do not stay consistent with anything in my life, it begins to diminish in some way or another.
Okay, so, I got a writing coach!
And she ended up being a colorful ball of awesome.
My first session with her, which were all FREE, she told me when she listens to music she can see the musical notes and likes to eat them.
She was super special and honored all that made her, HER while still showing up as a talented and professional writer. She believed in her self regardless of how she dressed or spoke and what others thought about it. She showed up everyday comfortable in her skin, which allowed her to focus more on what she wanted from life (vision) and what she was doing everyday to fulfill that (mission).
Meeting her was inspiration enough to honor my unique characteristics more in public. I was surely inspired to amplify my self belief, at least a smidge more.
Being taught by her for 2 months truly changed my life, both personally as well as academically. It’s not that I don’t have good thoughts. It;s that I have loads of thoughts and it can get tough to organize them, especially when writing THE application essay to be admitted to the massive University you were alway afraid to apply to. You know, the institution I stupidly convinced my self I could never attend and did not deserve to anyways. Oofph, yeah, that last episode of From Struggle to Success really put my poor mindset on blast. A fixed mindset will not comfortably propel you forward in life.
It can be really weird looking back at how I felt about my self and life……I wonder often how and why the F* I was such a negative nancy in regards to my self!?
I have theories…*face palm* …….*self hug*
You will hear allllllll about them over time.
Looking back, I faced a lot of deep set smaller fears when I chose to move forward and seek help.
I was embarrassed to need help.
I was embarrassed and ashamed to not have good writing skills.
My anxiety, generally speaking and pun intended, always tries to convince me human contact is to be avoided at all costs.
Set forth on an "impossible" goal to apply to the biggest university in the state.
I had to recognize my own abilities, both born with as well as learned & earned. Establishing a strong self belief was what I was missing amidst my large capacity of grit and vision.
Nowadays, I am always working to minimize the capacity to feel ashamed for things that I do, regardless of the outcome or expectation. I can propel forward and find success in any struggle, whether out in the physical world or inside my brain or body.
How?
Well, after years of high and low life experiences, whether in business or personal endeavors and in conjunction with never ending research, development, and ongoing education, I created a blueprint for life that undeniably rewires your brain and changes your nervous system for successful outcomes and greater life satisfaction overall. It consists of 5 fundamental components that I will mention in a bit and uses groundbreaking as well as foundational research in: cognitive psychology, behavioral psychology, developmental psychology and neuro plasticity, sociology and interpersonal skills, anxiety and depression coping mechanisms, the nervous and autonomic system, resilience and goal setting, and good old fashioned motivational speaking.
Your life B.Print, quite basically, builds the best version of a human in the body and mind, as to be able to thrive in any situation.
We re-wire as to FEEL good about making the best, most important decisions aligned with our vision. Thai is how humans work: we act off of how we feel.
It is pertinent that we feel good about the direction we are going in life, or else we will not do it with great effort or the required consistency.
PS you can rewire how you're dumping dopamine. This is major within the B.Print component of setting and accomplishing Goals.
Before I had a strongly developed B.Print, I made mistake after mistake and felt forever on the hamster wheel of consequences. It was too difficult for me to see, in my old mindset, how my mistakes were typically accomplishments and gifts to better improve. I continually shut my self down every time I felt like a failure, felt shame or guilt, or saw my self as lesser than others.
Developing and forever working on the 5 fundamental components to life’s B.Print guarantees successful outcomes in career, finances, relationships, health, and overall life satisfaction. Those 5 pivotal components are: Vision, Growth Mindset, Self Belief, Goals, and Grit.
My main struggles in life have been with self belief and a growth mindset. I can get very fixed in believing I am a big pile of poo. And then depression gets cozy and super settles in for the long haul. AND THEN I have to begin the hard work of self repair, rather than continuous forward motion when I do believe in myself, because depression is a doozy to overcome and instills the sludgiest mindset that's tricky to clean up. It can definitely feel easier to give up in the short term, but the reality is that giving up just creates further problems that then need to be addressed throughout the long term.
Let's not even get started on the health effects of obsessive rumination.
Nowadays I work diligently to maintain a growth mindset with a solid self belief as to steer clear of another party with depression. I make sure to DO the things that ensure a healthy mindset, such as staying active and a solid morning routine.
Using the B.Print model for life, I can know for certain I am on the right path.
Shoot, a lot of gurus say just VISION alone is enough to thrive in life.
Psychology argues there's a bit more to it than vision alone, and I’ve spent the last decade developing a mighty useful roadmap for life - a life blueprint for how to perceive, function, make decisions, and feel about all the intricacies of life along the road to success & satisfaction.
Maybe you're not ready yet to solidify your B.Print.
Maybe you are in a deep transitional phase.
A great first step is seeing your life how you want it.
A great first step to be happier, healthier, and honestly having more money is by having a VISION for your life.
Are you ready to see it and believe it beeb?
When you’re ready feel free to download the free workbook + interactive modules to get your most best and authentic life started.
This is a lifestyle. Join the movement.
All the best today beebs!
YOU F*ING GOT THIS
- Breezi
